Pursiut of Happiness

These days I've been thinking. Thinking of how my limited choices would have limited me.

Yes up till now I still don't have any preference in going back to the food industry. I dread working in a factory.

Maybe just because of a one time exposure, which hence gave me a phobia to stay away from food processing plants, is not really fair nor doing justice. Maybe after getting exposed to a few food factories will change my views and feelings for them?

All this while I thought I forsook food technology because of the low pay. But when I look back on my life, money never really did played a significant part of my happiness. I can live without good food, nor do I visit clubs and bars for booze and beer. I have lived my university days with just bread and Milo, biscuits, without a single grain of rice.

I admit I dread facing the working world. I dread to not be able to do what I like, what I want. People only work to survive (well most people). Out of the millions of people out there working, we all know that only a few find their ideal job.

I dread more having to face one of my nightmares, is to enroll in a job, in a field that I have almost given up on, where I study because I needed to.

But what dreads me most is being pressured to get a job. To be honest, the days I'm living in now are as bad as the days I dread about my FYP.

Life is a War

"Life is like a box of chocolates."

Well  screw you Forest! Not that I hate you, but for different people and seen through different perspectives, life is not always a box of chocolates.

Life is a war zone. Your graduation from your alma mater is no less than graduating from a military academy. You get your first job aka become enlisted in the army. You start from the lowest rank in the company. You are cannon fodder.

You spend your whole life, battling cannons and bombs. Only different thing about working is, you don't die literally, or end up without your limbs if you've stepped on a landmine. Sometimes you get screwed by your captain. Your captain gets screwed by his major, and then the General screws everyone under his control.

We spend all our life, working up the military hierarchy if the modern working world. We ourselves dream to someday become a major, admiral or whatsoever. It seems like this is life's only way of progress.

What if, life is not a war? What if, there's no need to get enlisted into society's modern warfare?

Maybe life is a war. War starts with one person or incident, and gets carried out by the entire nation. Your neighbour buys a new car. You work your ass off to buy a bigger one to show him you're better.

There's no escape. You either join the ranks and work your ass up the ranks, or you become an emo farmer watching the tanks steamrolling across your crop fields when war breaks loose.

Me? I don't wanna be any of them, if I could have it my way. If life is a war, you make the most of it. You become, THE ARMS DEALER...

*ps I love Forest Gump!! 

Life

Actually this happened quite a long time ago, but in this sem... Here's a story, true life story, about me, that I wanted to share...

On that very day...

I was rushing for my food analysis project. So when everything was done(we had our discussion in the TEKUN cafe), so I saw one of my junior calling me over to do a survey. A survey from Pharmacy school it seems...

It was a survey about death. Death in the sense of, asking the opinions of us, in what condition we hope to die in, and in what condition we are willing to die. Don't mess these two up. The first one means, how will you choose to die, for example, bedridden, sick, suffering from pain, unable to carry out daily activities and so on. Of course sure wanna die in sleep rite? No suffering...

The second one means, you are put into a situation, from best to worse. It is to determine which situation that you choose to leave the world(as the situation gets tougher and harder, you might think: Walao eh, like this ar, die faster better) kind of situation... :D

Well, at first I didn't know that I was going to take such a hard survey. And a serious one... XD Cos when my junior called me over, I just heard the last word he said.

"After you finished this survey, got RM10 arr!!"

"Sure anot?"

" I already taken lo... SEE!!!"

"I'm on"

So I had to wait till my turn for the surveyor to survey me. Then only I realise what survey I was up to, why people took such a long time to finish this survey.

It started by arranging about 2o situations, by personal point of view, from favourable, to well, nightmare...

The situation is only based on 4 criteria(I think), so its just either can, merely,cannot, no, little, alot. It was very very confusing.

Then came the hard part. I'll give an example. You are unable to carry out daily activities, have mild pain, and bedridden. Would you choose to live or die. I chose to live. Here comes the second part. You are given a chance to live five years in a better situation, let's say, you are not bedridden, but are unable to carry out daily activities, mild pain and bla bla(means you are just one point better then the previous situation.) or to live 10 years in the worser condition. If you choose the worser situation, then continue with subsequent questions where the chances to live in a better situation in a longer period increases, till the difference of the period is half a month.

I was very serious in that quiz. I pondered and thought. But in the end, I always ended up choosing to live longer. Even the surveyor, I don't know whether she thinks I'm joking, told me I was very optimistic, and in her survey statistic, well, let's just say I'm the critical value on the far side of the graph XD.

I learned that, death isn't the way to avoid any kinds of pain and torture. We can die anyday if we want(that would be suicide), have sudden death(murdered or maybe times up?), but in the end, we are going to live in this world once, LIVE ON EARTH ONCE! Minus the reborn thingy if you out there are so religious.

So if we are going to live here once, why not live longer, whether it's only a month, a day, an hour, or even till a minute?

Death may take away pain and fear, but it also seperate us from who we love, forever, even the memories that we had together...

So, what say you? Life, or Death?