Monday, May 2, 2016


It's funny that a guy in his twenties (ok fine late twenties) has a strong notion that time and life is short.

And fearing death... In a way that where dreams are set out not being achieved before time and earth consumes us...

I think it all started after I finished reading Jobs by end of last year. Through the book I saw a man so inclined to change the world. So aware that life is a ticking time bomb which can go off anytime. And making most of his life to create a dent in the history in mankind.

Jobs hit me hard. It helped create a mental checklist in my head. It reminds me time to time that life and time is finite. It reminds me that time is precious.

As we slowly walk through our twenties and enter our thirties, there are different stages of life expectations. What people expects of us, and what we expect of ourselves.

My wish of entering a new chapter in my life materialized during the early part of this year. I am thrilled and excited of the small changes and steps I have set and achieved as I caution myself to the looming half year mark of 2016.

There are goals and resolutions which I have achieved in this year. There are a number in progress. There are also a few yet to have started.

As much as I am satisfied of my progress, there's still a bit of worry. What I lack, is a solid long term goal. A 10 year, 5 year plan. A big life achievement in the horizon.

And then to dissect this long term plan, into tiny pieces. Key milestone to be achieved year by year.

There are plenty of long term goals going on in my head. But as I have mentioned, it is not solid. No strong urge to pushing it to be a reality. No proper planning to draw out this master plan, this blueprint and progress monitoring to ensure its success as the time comes.

I need to do this one of these days. I need to draw out my master plans that will not only change my life, hopefully mankind too.

One of these days.... Yes I must...

Sunday, January 10, 2016

What A Start...

I need another story
Something to get off my chest
My life gets kinda boring
Need something that I can confess

I need a break. I need a change. I am sick of not getting where I want but still remaining here...

Sunday, December 27, 2015

Reviewing My 2015

27th December 2015...

How time flies...

To be honest, I started off 2015 without any major resolutions in place even though a partially successful one in 2014 (I managed to have a well drafted one, up till the to-do's for my daily life. My resolutions slowly crept in along the year, which wasn't that bad at all!

Reading wise I set a realistic target for myself of 30 books. I'm at 27, not really hitting the target but as an overall, I would give myself a pat on the back for keeping that close to the target.

Health and fitness wise, that far off and almost died off dream to enroll myself in a full marathon (42km) is as elusive as ever. There was no urge to join up a marathon to cross that off my to-be-achieve list. But what I revered was the discipline I put myself through by joining up gym, in conjunction of my preparation for my Mt Kinabalu hike in the month of May. Although that discipline has been waning off in the recent months where work is taking off my time more and more, there is still that ounce of strength to push myself to gym during the weekends when I could be almost flat out.

I spent less and less time on entertainment (watching movies, playing games and browsing facebook aimlessly). That partially contributed to more reading time, I all but stopped watching dramas. I cut down on browsing through facebook. A 1G data quota ensure I minimize facebook on my phone significantly. I would want to keep up and improve on this if possible.

I am still on the starting line in learning more on investments. The thought of learning to invest, whether be it on shares or doing something to earn abit more money has been always cropping up in my mind time to time. But due to the not-so-urgent nature and time constraint, I haven't really been able dabble or venture more into it. I hope to put in more effort and time in this, as I know it will play an important part in the future.

Also what could I had changed in 2015 was to successfully take up a job offer in Singapore. Due to personal reasons and beliefs, I had took up the decision to looking into the possibility of working in Singapore. I missed the one and only chance I got back in September and I hope plenty of opportunity arises in the coming New Year. Needless to say I am desperate in a change for the better in my life.

The notion of having time calculated as years brings great benefits and sometimes despair. I am sure each of us would look back and ponder what 2015 has been to each of us. It will be sweet when we reminiscent the sweet times; sour and bitter when we revisit the sad and tragic moments... Like it or not, each year is different in its own ways, 2015 would soon be the past as 2016 slowly creeps upon us.

Let the lessons in 2015 make us better, and the triumphs and joy drive us to better heights. I know this sounds abit early but definitely better than late, here's to a Great 2016.

May The Force Be With You...

Saturday, November 28, 2015


One week of sickness is the worst I have gone through so far.

Usually it clears off completely within 3 days. After that I am fit and fighting once again.

This time round, it subsided last week, but came right back on Monday.

Ever since then it was dizziness, headache, flu, coughing and sore throat.

And today after what seems to be a good morning and road to recovery, the blocked nose comes back on. Not as bad as yesterday but still a nuisance.

It certainly impacts a lot on the mood. No one's cherry while down with a blocked nose.

Blue and moody...

Sunday, November 22, 2015

Quarter Life Crisis

I think this is the worst of em'all

But I think its normal to have quarter life crisis.

As I believe so that most of us has it.

Especially for those born in the 1980s. Most of us now have already started working for a few years already.

So what's next?

People who had gotten new offers or promotions, changed working environment perhaps will feel the effects less. At least a new challenge beckons. A life event. Becoming a manager. Climbing up the corporate ladder.

Things however, aren't just the same for someone who has spent going-to-be 3 years in the same position. And especially for a guy. The need of wanting to be bigger, bolder, better is in our blood, perhaps encoded in our DNA.

With a switch already anticipated in mind, the yet-to-come offer or chance is kinda taking a toll on me. Not in a bad way that it impacts my way of life.

It's more of like reading a chapter of a book, desperately waiting for the next brand new chapter.

side note: I think the mind cannot be allowed to slack or programmed to be routine. At least mind's is working that way. Sometimes people change not because of dislike. I think most of the time people change for a fresh perspective and challenge.

Tuesday, November 10, 2015

Déjà vu

I have been here before.

That restlessness in me. Tired of the current life I am in. Not to be ungrateful, but I know I am someone who can't stand mediocrity, routine and mundane.

Life has been mehhh lately really. Nothing concrete to look forward to. Plenty of plans and effort to make a concrete future change, but still no sign of it yet.

This was the same sucky feeling I had back when I was working part time in La Promise. Staring at the skies so black yet clear. Wishing that I was up there among the stars.

And many things happened after that. One helluva interview knockout stages to a brief 3 month job until now, passing the 2 year mark at my current company.

I have friends who had undergone changes. Some remained as they had found their passion. Others maybe changing faster than the usual.

I am plotting mine... Although it is a leap of faith compared to those that I have. I have given my all and I am waiting for the same darn chance that I floundered months ago.

I know I am ready for the change. I just need that opportunity.

Please... Grant me my wish...

They say the sky is always the darkest before the light comes. Well it better hell be true...

Friday, October 2, 2015

Happiness And Fulfillment

I am blessed in my current situation.

Comparatively I am well off. Thanks to some financial support of my parents, I am living a life where not many in their mid-twenties can afford.

I acknowledge that. I am thankful of that. I know I am blessed for that.

But the fact is still undeniable. I am not entirely happy. Sure every now and then I happen to be in the middle of joyous celebrations and occasions, being relatively near to friends, relatives and family.

My physiological demands and needs are almost all fulfilled. But up the pyramid I go, here I am worried about my future and safety. The assurance that my future is alright.

And then another level up. The sense of belonging. Having someone to cherish and being loved.

I admit these are the 2 needs that I lust for at the moment. As life is always a climb to the top, I find myself yearning for new needs to be happy and fulfilled.

p.s. who would have thought what I learnt back then in one of the small topics of Minor Management can stay in my head up till now. FYI its called the Maslow Hierarchy of Needs.