Reviewing My 2015

27th December 2015...

How time flies...

To be honest, I started off 2015 without any major resolutions in place even though a partially successful one in 2014 (I managed to have a well drafted one, up till the to-do's for my daily life. My resolutions slowly crept in along the year, which wasn't that bad at all!

Reading wise I set a realistic target for myself of 30 books. I'm at 27, not really hitting the target but as an overall, I would give myself a pat on the back for keeping that close to the target.

Health and fitness wise, that far off and almost died off dream to enroll myself in a full marathon (42km) is as elusive as ever. There was no urge to join up a marathon to cross that off my to-be-achieve list. But what I revered was the discipline I put myself through by joining up gym, in conjunction of my preparation for my Mt Kinabalu hike in the month of May. Although that discipline has been waning off in the recent months where work is taking off my time more and more, there is still that ounce of strength to push myself to gym during the weekends when I could be almost flat out.

I spent less and less time on entertainment (watching movies, playing games and browsing facebook aimlessly). That partially contributed to more reading time, I all but stopped watching dramas. I cut down on browsing through facebook. A 1G data quota ensure I minimize facebook on my phone significantly. I would want to keep up and improve on this if possible.

I am still on the starting line in learning more on investments. The thought of learning to invest, whether be it on shares or doing something to earn abit more money has been always cropping up in my mind time to time. But due to the not-so-urgent nature and time constraint, I haven't really been able dabble or venture more into it. I hope to put in more effort and time in this, as I know it will play an important part in the future.

Also what could I had changed in 2015 was to successfully take up a job offer in Singapore. Due to personal reasons and beliefs, I had took up the decision to looking into the possibility of working in Singapore. I missed the one and only chance I got back in September and I hope plenty of opportunity arises in the coming New Year. Needless to say I am desperate in a change for the better in my life.

The notion of having time calculated as years brings great benefits and sometimes despair. I am sure each of us would look back and ponder what 2015 has been to each of us. It will be sweet when we reminiscent the sweet times; sour and bitter when we revisit the sad and tragic moments... Like it or not, each year is different in its own ways, 2015 would soon be the past as 2016 slowly creeps upon us.

Let the lessons in 2015 make us better, and the triumphs and joy drive us to better heights. I know this sounds abit early but definitely better than late, here's to a Great 2016.

May The Force Be With You...

Sick

One week of sickness is the worst I have gone through so far.

Usually it clears off completely within 3 days. After that I am fit and fighting once again.

This time round, it subsided last week, but came right back on Monday.

Ever since then it was dizziness, headache, flu, coughing and sore throat.

And today after what seems to be a good morning and road to recovery, the blocked nose comes back on. Not as bad as yesterday but still a nuisance.

It certainly impacts a lot on the mood. No one's cherry while down with a blocked nose.

Blue and moody...

Quarter Life Crisis

I think this is the worst of em'all

But I think its normal to have quarter life crisis.

As I believe so that most of us has it.

Especially for those born in the 1980s. Most of us now have already started working for a few years already.

So what's next?

People who had gotten new offers or promotions, changed working environment perhaps will feel the effects less. At least a new challenge beckons. A life event. Becoming a manager. Climbing up the corporate ladder.

Things however, aren't just the same for someone who has spent going-to-be 3 years in the same position. And especially for a guy. The need of wanting to be bigger, bolder, better is in our blood, perhaps encoded in our DNA.

With a switch already anticipated in mind, the yet-to-come offer or chance is kinda taking a toll on me. Not in a bad way that it impacts my way of life.

It's more of like reading a chapter of a book, desperately waiting for the next brand new chapter.

side note: I think the mind cannot be allowed to slack or programmed to be routine. At least mind's is working that way. Sometimes people change not because of dislike. I think most of the time people change for a fresh perspective and challenge.

Déjà vu

I have been here before.

That restlessness in me. Tired of the current life I am in. Not to be ungrateful, but I know I am someone who can't stand mediocrity, routine and mundane.

Life has been mehhh lately really. Nothing concrete to look forward to. Plenty of plans and effort to make a concrete future change, but still no sign of it yet.

This was the same sucky feeling I had back when I was working part time in La Promise. Staring at the skies so black yet clear. Wishing that I was up there among the stars.

And many things happened after that. One helluva interview knockout stages to a brief 3 month job until now, passing the 2 year mark at my current company.

I have friends who had undergone changes. Some remained as they had found their passion. Others maybe changing faster than the usual.

I am plotting mine... Although it is a leap of faith compared to those that I have. I have given my all and I am waiting for the same darn chance that I floundered months ago.

I know I am ready for the change. I just need that opportunity.

Please... Grant me my wish...

They say the sky is always the darkest before the light comes. Well it better hell be true...

Happiness And Fulfillment

I am blessed in my current situation.

Comparatively I am well off. Thanks to some financial support of my parents, I am living a life where not many in their mid-twenties can afford.

I acknowledge that. I am thankful of that. I know I am blessed for that.

But the fact is still undeniable. I am not entirely happy. Sure every now and then I happen to be in the middle of joyous celebrations and occasions, being relatively near to friends, relatives and family.

My physiological demands and needs are almost all fulfilled. But up the pyramid I go, here I am worried about my future and safety. The assurance that my future is alright.

And then another level up. The sense of belonging. Having someone to cherish and being loved.

I admit these are the 2 needs that I lust for at the moment. As life is always a climb to the top, I find myself yearning for new needs to be happy and fulfilled.

p.s. who would have thought what I learnt back then in one of the small topics of Minor Management can stay in my head up till now. FYI its called the Maslow Hierarchy of Needs.

Of Short Fused, Impatience and Enlightenment

We all changed through the tidings of time.

I used to be a patient guy. Or should I say "long fused", difficult to get mad. I was calm. Docile.

I think this change of me happened along the period when I started living in the city. Bustling, busy, always on the go. Patience gets tested, and this particular ability gets lost and eroded.

I find myself more prone to irritations. Though still able to contain my feelings to prevent outbursts and arguments, I noticed that I get into situations where I'm in the midst of a hot debate, which totally irks and repels me.

Impatience is the aftermath trait we all gain if we lose the ability of patience. In many ways it is actually beneficial. I try to look at impatience as a gift these days. Not wanting to hear crap or bullshit, breezing past people who are walking idly as if they own the whole damn road, escalator and etc., you name it. 

I seriously think that sometimes the lax nature that Malaysians have could be one of the factors we are lagging behind. People keep saying oh give us more time, we'll be the South East Asian strong house by 2020. Well 5 years to go, and we are losing even to Indonesia.

Japan has saw 2 of its major cities reduced to ashes during the second world war. They have now surge to be one of the strongest countries in Asia. South Korea boosts one of the most front line technologies in the world. Singapore, with no land for crops and agriculture, seeking independence from Malaysia, has sprinted towards a better tomorrow. 

And here we are in Malaysia, thinking that we need more time. We are too lax. By observing just one simple trait, just by the speed we walk, can give a glimpse of how we are actually doing in terms of embracing the future. I am appalled. 

p.s. Seriously MYsians should be educated to stay on one side of the elevator or pavements to make way for rushing people.

I'm grateful of my current job. It's a technical job. What I do, learn or apply can bore the crap out of people who studied marketing and finance. But I am thankful that by being solid technically, one learns the essence and basics of life - Logic and Laws of Science. Even the most mundane sales pitch or marketing idea cannot mask or change logic and facts. Hard to believe sales pitch or marketing idea undoubtedly may induce periodical doubts and paradigm shifts, but if it won't work, it ain't gonna work. The enlightenment that I gain was being brilliant at logic and facts, and being practical, which help changed my mindset quite a bit. There is a change of how I see things now compared to 2 years ago.

I am slowly becoming a city guy. Or should I say I am already one. I cannot imagine myself going back to a life in idyllic Taiping. I have changed...

And I know I changed for the better. 

Enlightenment. 

Chapter 26: Independence

Life is a story. And we ourselves are the author of our story. How great we are going to turn out to be, lies all in our hands. 

That being said though, some chapters in life are more or less fixed. Like being born where about in this world. Our race. Family. Financial situation. And then the almost 10 years of compulsory education where the majority of us undergo.

But that's just the framework or so called parts of life that everyone goes through. But what one does or how one does remains variable. Examples one of us can only write of being a top student back then. Or being the rascal or troublemaker that earned plenty of spankings.  

And then comes the chapter of getting into Universities. Life gets so much twists and turns in this chapter. What courses one takes somehow ultimately shapes one's future specifically and differently from the others. 

Here I am. 2 years with Nestle. And 2 years living away from home. But I still remember clearly, staring to the skies as I cleaned the plates and cutlery at the back of a cafe I worked for 3 months back then. It was a tough period. I was struggling to find a decent job. I questioned myself. What are you doing in a cafe when your friends are working in KL or Penang. I was lost in writing my next chapter of life. 

Of course there was also complacency that reassured me that life will work out sooner or later. And I don't really need to worry of anything as I was still living with my parents in my hometown. But there was an inner voice, calling out for a new challenge and a new chapter of life.  

That decision and opportunity to come to a PJ, considered a wish come true after being sick of dependent and complacent. Currently, life is great. I earn enough to feed myself and rent a room from my relatives. My life is pretty much hassle free apart from my job.

But 2 years of a chapter I'm currently in is enough. It is not wrong to continue writing the same chapter. But life is short. Sooner or later one has to go through the stage of being independent. Living alone. Getting married and raising a family. Comparing myself to my other friends, some have already lived alone and some have already married. I'm considered slow in my story of life.

So here I am, with that anxiety we all have when we are faced with a new challenge, here's to a next chapter of life.

And many more to come...

#2centsworth On #LatelyInMalaysia

1. Farah Ann Abdul Hadi is a talented sportswoman who has brought fame and glory to Malaysia in the SEA games. Islamists hardcores who are upset with gymnastic attires & KK mountain nudists should learn from each other to re-calibrate themselves to social norms.

2. Nazri is being a douche bag for infuriating the Rakyat by being so "vocal" with nonsense in giving support to the current PM. Until he came out with the statement against the Johore Crown Prince:"At least I was elected". So are you questioning the monarch's position???

Advices

Define the best advice or guidance.

Is it the best alternative? Is it something we want to hear?

Neither. Most of the time it depends on a case to case scenario.

Most of the time, we don't really care much or ask for genuine opinions. Because most of the time, we ask to hear ASSURANCE.

Don't get it? Try this...

"Hey look that dress looks nice right. Do you think it would look nice on me?"

Obviously if the dress is not nice, it would not have attracted you. You wouldn't even have thought of trying it on. But you are asking for an OPINION with the intention of ASSURANCE from someone that you are indeed correct.

We also ask for advises to get EMPATHY

"Sigh this is too difficult for me. I have no idea on how to progress even though I have spent 7 hours on this. I'm really hopeless aren't I?"

You could be genuine in feeling down. But if there is someone beside you, deep down there you would want a touch of empathy from the company you have during a difficult situation. People yearn for praises and attention. Too much of course is no good but a good dose of empathy during such situations are great encouragement.

Just by 2 simple examples I bet deep down there's a paradigm shift of why people ask for opinions and advises. Are we really that snobbish to ask for sincere guidance and opinions?

Still there are situations where real advises and guidance are being requested. Fret not. But just a small fraction of it.

Another simple example? Rarely does someone ask for advises from parents during their teenage years or late teens.

We never doubted our parents point of views. Most of the time they are right (yeap that took quite a while to realize). But why not ask for advice?

Why not ask them whether smoking is something to do or not? Why not ask for comfort or solace when you first breakup? Or when you have difficulties back then?

Because we know, what is right or wrong already. We know what a grown up would say to a seemingly small problem but a big one to us since its the first time we are encountering it.

Because we know, we don't need to be told what to do. What we wanted was ASSURANCE or EMPATHY. Or even both. And parents being parents will just give you LOGIC, which is often harsh truth that we are not willing to accept fully and whole heartedly at that moment of time.

*no disrespect to parents who live their children. But sometimes to let your child learn to walk, you gotta let them fall and let them learn to pick themselves up. 

Opportunity

Opportunities come and go time to time

Sometimes we let go of one opportunity in hope for another one. A better one.

It may come. It may not come. No one knows.

That is why they say a bird in a hand is better than 2 on the bush. To be content with what we have. To be happy. To find solutions to a problem.

And never let anger mix with the words we utter. Cause anger can make us do terrible things.

A Piece of Me

You are the piece of my heart
That I would find from yard to yard
Cause without this missing part
My heart never seems to be beating hard

You are the piece of my mind
Whom I have been dreaming to find
Never have I come across someone this fine
Whom I am happy to say that she's mine

You are the piece of me
Together with you is what I wanna be
So now I pray to finding that key
To unlock this lock of misery

Against All Odds

How can I just let you walk away?

Just let you leave without a trace

When I stand here taking every breath with you, ooh

You're the only one who really knew me at all

How can you just walk away from me

When all I can do is watch you leave?

'Cause we've shared the laughter and the pain

And even shared the tears

You're the only one who really knew me at all

So take a look at me now

'Cause there's just an empty space

There's nothing left here to remind me

Just the memory of your face

So take a look at me now

And there's just an empty space

And you coming back to me is against the odds

And that's what I've got to face

I wish I could just make you turn around

Turn around and see me cry

There's so much I need to say to you

So many reasons why

You're the only one who really knew me at all

So take a look at me now

Well, there's just an empty space

And there's nothing left here to remind me

Just the memory of your face

So take a look at me now

'Cause there's just an empty space

But to wait for you is all I can do

And that's what I've got to face

Take a good look at me now

'Cause I'll still be standing here

And you coming back to me is against all odds

And it's the chance I've got to take

Chance I've got to take, got to take

Take a look at me now

Take a look at me now

Take a look at me now

Munching Apples Can Spoil Your Teeth!

If it was true though, there'd probably be studies and reports to back this myth right?

So there I was munching an apple happily while someone highly educated just threw this remark at me.

Of course not wanting to be told off that tartly I resolve to scouring the internet for truth on that comment.

Guess what? Apple does spoils your teeth!!

Sadly though, not by munching it on its own, but the fruit itself is acidic, which can corrode the enamel layer of your teeth.

Myth busted :)

Oh yeah. Do post any articles on munching apple which makes your teeth vulnerable to spoilage. Do enlighten this Dark Age mind of mine 

;)

Be Different

Happy 2015!

Resolutions!

Talking about resolutions seems like an annual thing. That's because most of us just talk about it - no action!

And year in year out, for those who do their resolutions, part of them are the same as previous year. That weight loss that was suppose to happen, that quit smoking thought etc.

I said before the trick was to come out with a big idea or plan and then list out the executions which can be done in a daily or weekly basis.It is this small steps that will make those resolutions come true.

I managed to keep up to my resolutions up till the month of June last year. By then the moment laziness and slackness kicks in, it really laid my routine to waste.

For this year I will maintain the same approach. But I would want my resolutions to be a bit different. Not just plainly how many books to read, how many hours of working out. I want a lists of to-do's which will have an impact in my future. Not just an achievement to look back.

Time to set some resolutions which can change your future, one you would look back and say, "hey, I'm really glad I started doing this back then in year 2015."

Time to be different.